"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase" ~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

Any mom who has ever been divorced is very familiar with 'What Now?' times - those moments when life throws a curve ball and we feel like we're standing alone on a ledge - when we honestly don't know what the next move is. Yikes! Those are our 'What Now' times. Life as a divorced mom is full of them: a sudden financial crunch; a change in custody; a sudden illness - big things that can scare us to death and leave us wondering how we will ever get through.

The truth is no one gets through life without a few 'What Nows', but there are ways you can make those scary times a little bit easier on yourself and your family - and even get solutions to your 'What Now' moments quicker and with much less stress. A few suggestions to get you started:

1. Slow down. I know. It sounds impossible. Right when life feels like it's falling apart, you're supposed to slow down? Well, yes. What Now moments require that we slow down and shift from being reactionary to being responsive. When you're reacting, nothing gets accomplished and you actually create more drama, trauma and panic. Go slow and focus on responding to your situation instead. Responding will help you to stay grounded, make sound decisions and actually resolve the issue. So, slow down and respond. You don't need to clear every hurdle right now and slowing down, even for a little while, doesn't mean you're going to slow down forever.

2. Have faith. It doesn't really matter what your personal brand of spirituality is, but it does matter that you make room for some sort of faith in your life and you practice it daily. Meditating, praying, talking to angels, practicing gratitude, taking a walk in nature - however you recognize Spirit - has been proven to reduce your stress, lower your blood pressure, improve your sleep, build your immune system and.... actually bring solutions to your 'What Now' times. Practicing your brand of faith is your secret superpower when you're a divorced mom. Faith helps you to feel connected and secure and expand your trust & joy in life - which is exactly what you need during a 'What Now' moment.

3. Stop looking for the answers. If you're busy straining for solutions, you're probably not going to find them. It's a paradox: the harder you look for what you want, the less likely you'll be able to find it. As counter-intuitive as it feels, now is the time to take a deep breath and try to relax. When you let down your guard, then you'll be able to receive insights, inspirations and opportunities, all of which lead to solutions. But you've got to ease into it. You're not supposed to have all the answers right now. You're in a 'What Now' phase. It's hard to remember how to tie your shoes, let alone figure out your life.

4. Allow others in. Going it alone is not the mark of a savvy Solo Mama. It's the mark of a woman who has forgotten she is an important part of the whole, and that whole wants to help her out - that whole has answers and love and guidance that she needs. The truth is, you need help - a lot of it - when you hit a 'What Now' road bump. Accept help. Allow others in. Allow solutions to reveal themselves to you. Be open to new people, new ideas and new ways of support. Don't get so tethered to 'knowing exactly what must be done' that you become a lone ranger out there.

'What Now' times can rattle us to our core, but if we let them in and handle them well, they also serve to rock our worlds in the very best of ways. The next time you're facing such a time remember the above and go at it with a little more ease. The right solutions and goodness will flow back into your life, and you'll be back on track before you know it.

Be with it, Mamas!